9: Losing a loved one and having feelings about it

I lost my aunt last week, and it’s been difficult.

I’m not good at expressing feelings, so I thought I would just give my one memory of her that means the most to me.

>>>>DIARY: Acknowledge the light or else!

When I was in high school, we were sitting together at Buckeye Lake during some family event. We were sitting at the picnic table.

I remember her asking me what I wanted to do in college. What did I want to do with my life? I told her I wanted to write and maybe do commercials. Her response was that I could do whatever I wanted, as long as I loved it.

She was the role model I needed. She was older, independent and owned her own business. That’s what I wanted. I love my mom, but it’s no secret we did not get along when I was in my formative teen years.

>>>>BLOGS: The corporate donut monster and terrible traffic

Judy was independent and gave me the courage to be the independent woman I wanted to be. She was my second mother in many ways. When I needed money, she paid me $25 an hour to proofread for her. She always told me I was beautiful.

SIDENOTE: Editing copy for architects is a nightmare, and I see why she gave me all that work.

In summation, Judy was an outsider to our family and blended in with ease. She showed me how to be your own person, while still being a part of a giant family. Judy showed me how to be a loveable bitch, and I am grateful to her.